There she is, glowing like a full on goddess. I mean, are you looking outside this eve? Do you see the magnificent lunar eclipse? I’m fiercely floored. Reds and greenie-blues and ivory hues, haloes galore, capped by a mad rush of whispy little clouds. I love this night.
My LA weekend proved to be a life-changing jaunt. I saw my Pisces prince for fake-drinks and french fries, spent scads of time with the Biz Partner/Wonder Twin as we continue to quest for world domination, enjoyed the hours with Best Friends J&A more than I have words, and took a trip down to the ashram to see beloved Z, the spiritual family, and yes, the amazing Guru.
He made time for me. That alone just makes me float and soar. It’s not a matter of feeling worthy – I am no more/less than anyone – but it still makes me feel so blessed. We discussed all matters of spirituality and ascension. He rightly pointed out I had been dangerously flirting with darkness and dualities – things I will continue to pursue as I get more skilled on how to handle the resulting forces. As He stated, the souffle hasn’t yet finished cooking – but man, when I’m ready to dive, you better believe I’m going deep. I’m going to be plucking the innocents from drowning in the darkness, bringing whomever I can back into the light. There’s a reason I can’t stop yearning for more shamanic ceremonies – this is who I am.
He also confirmed what others have been warning me about – I have been in danger. All this obsession on the Other Side has spurred up the attention of energies I can’t afford to welcome. We talked about such things in such a relaxed, nonchalant fashion – it felt more than a little surreal. But I have a clear way to stay clear, as it were, and I feel electrified, focused, love-filled, and joyous.
That’s not to say drama did not ensue. The day after my Guru session, I had a marathon meeting morning with Biz Partner. During the second face to face, I felt assaulted by an incredible pain, which pierced the top of my shoulder and sailed all the way down through my ribcage. Every breath intensified the steady, pulsing ache, and by the time I got to the airport some 4 hours later, I thought passing out was a true possibility. I kept it in check through the ride home, and threw myself on my alter as I walked through the front door. I can’t even tell you how hard I cried all night, speaking in ways I am not accustomed to hearing. Asking for help, see. It’s not something I Know.
I called out to all my angels, Guru included, and asked to receive the message, and thus release the pain.
I screamed and moaned and gargled my way into a deep slumber, and when I awoke, just one phrase lingered in my mind . . .
“I am of the light.”
Which made me realize I had been saved.
The Guru, I suspect, was extracting a demon or two. Sound far fetched? Believe me, I know. Everything I experience these days seems like a half-lie, because of the magnitude and intangible nature. And yet, I believe. With all that I am. All I can go on is how I feel – then and now, and every moment in between.
Can I trust that the moon is really shining above me, shifting into a myriad of colors and reflections? That’s a big yes. Well then, I can’t help but believe that anything else is possible too. Miracles are unfolding. Acknowledge them, and they multiply.
